bulky tomes, calmness settled
beguile tedious hours
This page might contain affiliate links. In the event of a sale, I will be awarded a small commission (at no extra cost for you).
What is wrong with me? When my husband was here, I am forcing him to leave and start his job in Montalban right away. It’s just that I am afraid he will miss the opportunity and leave us no financial source at all.
But now that he’s there, I am tired of waiting when he will come back. This time, it is because I am afraid again… afraid for having no control of the situation. Afraid the what ifs—what if he didn’t return? What if he completely leaves us here in the midst of a very expensive city where I do not know where to go or who to call to in times of crisis?
I noticed, like many others I have a problem with waiting (and perhaps with sanity).
Continue reading “7 Ways on how to Wait without Losing your Patience and Peace”
I’m the butterfly–
gorgeous creature in your palm
vast canvas of life
Now that you all know I am staying home, I have decided to embrace it for the moment until of course God change the course of my life. By embracing I mean totally and wholly giving myself to my role as a wife and a mother. This means totally leaving the past behind no matter how hurting and how I missed my work.
Just yesterday, my mother’s package arrived from Saudi. These are big box of groceries, a drum of clothes, shoes and bags and another box of curtains, pillow covers and bed sheets. It arrived at around 8:30 am just when we are about to go to school to get my kid’s report cards.
I am so very grateful with all these blessings. This comes right on time, just when we need them because my hubby has to start working again and we need supplies until he receive his first salary.
However, as I am unpacking all the clothes and bags, I can’t help but felt an ache inside me. Those clothes are meant for office, for a working mother. The shoes, the blazers, the very attractive bags suits a working woman I used to be. That made me teary eyed.
Continue reading “4 life’s essentials that a stay-at-home woman should focus on to gain her self-fulfillment (even when she’s nailed at home)”
silent tears bursting
the clown’s smile faded faster
in that sweet event
This is a personal blog post. Please check my helpful posts if you are not comfortable reading personal accounts. Thanks.
By the way, if you did not yet see my free e-book please have a peek here.
Last Tuesday, I have attended Moving-up event and today, Hans graduation. Hywell is in Kinder and Hans is grade six. Both of them are studying in Rizal Makati Elementary School.
To document this most important event in my life (for my own benefit lol!) I will post today some of the random thoughts and lessons I learned during the time I am in those occasions at school.
Continue reading “random thoughts, rants and lessons from my sons’ graduations”
candle bare flames
blackness arc of brilliant gold
stray embers they see
Boredom slowly taking its toll on me. It is creeping inside my body, squeezing my heart and made me pull my hair one by one. What I will be doing now that I have to stay at home? WHAT WILL I GONNA DO NOW?!!!
You know, I get used to working 12 hours a day before. I am a very workaholic person. Now I am here? The whole day today, I spent watching drama on TV. I am crying the whole afternoon until my eyes gets bulky. WAAAA!
Continue reading “why I write my goals even if I am now a certified stay-at-home who have an unknown future?”
black hole in my head
a void, swallowing my hopes
I am out of the office officially now. Yesterday, I have decided not go back at all. I have just made sure I will get my salary this 3/25. I am really, really happy that what I got as I leave is the same amount my husband got when he lost his job. That’s enough for us to float for three months back then.
But you know what? I am so afraid like I have to see the horrifying Michael Myers in John Carpenter’s film Halloween (I’m not yet born when this film was created). Well, I don’t know where we go from here now that I lost my best source of income. The income that gives us food on the table, appliances, clothes, groceries and sense of pride. Now it’s gone.
After leaving the office, I ate Lumpiang Sariwa in Goldilocks, Market-market. From there, I am seeing SM Aura where my office is… Gosh! I wanna cry.
Continue reading “how to get back to being a stay-at-home mom after losing your job?”
a bird musical sound
brings back into the moment
seed of nature’s peace
I don’t know what I am feeling as I handed my resignation paper to Boss M. Part of me is happy, really, really happy to finally free myself from that job full of nasty people. Another part though dies in me. There are times when I am subdued with loneliness because I know, I’ll get back to being financially useless again.
Soon, I’ll once again be imprisoned inside the house.
Continue reading “when a woman must stop working”
We have an on-the-spot eating out with my colleagues and Boss M. This is such a happy gatherings and filling one. We ate to our heart’s delight!
I ate a lot especially if I have to pay Php500.00 with that just one eating. I have to taste everything, from calamares, to barbecue, to crab, to squid, to sea shells, to sea weeds – yuck! If I can eat the sticks and the large bamboo that divides the food well, I can swallow them all. To hell with my growing tummy! I don’t care. I must eat the equivalent of the money I have paid for the food.
Because… because I am sad… so sad that if I can give myself a chance to cry that very moment, I can enable those sea foods creature swim to my tears instead of swimming in my stomach.
This is so crazy lonely!
Continue reading “to you who will about to lost all that you depends upon”
middle of the night
virtuous woman works so hard
face, a shining light!
Who is the Proverbs 31 woman to you?
Is she a stay-at-home woman or a working mom? Is she a simple wife without any make-up and dresses a usual t-shirt? Does she sleep early and wake-up late? Is she a planner? An organizer? A multitasker?
I always hear about her. Interpretation about her becomes a cliché already for me. But I believe that all of us have our own interpretation of every verse we read in the Bible depending on how the Holy Spirit minister to our hearts.
So today, let me share to you how I view the Proverbs 31 woman. How descriptions about her speaks to my heart. And how I am nearly measuring up to her. Yay!
I have here the top ten things about her that’s worthy for us to possess as a Christian woman.
Continue reading “top 10 facts about the Proverbs 31 woman”
a clingy small child
plays silently like kitten
I’ll miss crazily
He has this mannerism that before he sleeps, he playfully pinches my elbow. Whenever we walked together, he’s fond of kissing and pinching my elbow as if it is the most beautiful elbows he’d ever seen.
He’s just that ever since he’s a super cute baby but… that annoys me and made me feel ashamed. Moreover, his sharp fingernails cut deep in my charcoal colored elbows and leave contrasting white marks. Golly!
Continue reading “to a mother who forgets”
My wish was granted today, Valentines day. Wednesday becomes my day-off instead of Saturday. This means I have a rest in between the busy weekdays and Sunday, a time to go church.
This is great! My favorite day at work is Saturday, there’s too few people in the operation’s room. Too few employee roaming around in the pantry. No boss to work around. Yey!
And Wednesday, well, I can now go to bank and open account. I can now go to Government offices to renew my ID’s.
Ahh, best time to celebrate. I am able now to spent 8 hours in bed. Oh yeah, there’s a lot to think about in the office. There are over a hundred of emails waiting to bury me at work. Bull snot! I don’t want to think about that today! To hell with the devil.
Enough about that, let’s talk about the delicate subject of infidelity because I know, I know… we are capable of loving another person other than the one we married. This is my Valentines special post today! Sigh!
Continue reading “to you who’s tempted to love someone else”