consider the ravens
you are valuable than they
you’ll be provided
Should I still be a stay at home mom despite of our financial situation? That is the question I have to ask myself after receiving a small amount from my husband this week.
He does not even make it to 5K – our sufficient weekly budget to live better here in the City. I sighed, knowing that I can make better than this if I am the one who’s working.
Will this be the end of my martyrdom? Would I choose to work now?
Continue reading “5 reasons why I should still be a stay at home mom even when we barely afford it”
bulky tomes, calmness settled
beguile tedious hours
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What is wrong with me? When my husband was here, I am forcing him to leave and start his job in Montalban right away. It’s just that I am afraid he will miss the opportunity and leave us no financial source at all.
But now that he’s there, I am tired of waiting when he will come back. This time, it is because I am afraid again… afraid for having no control of the situation. Afraid the what ifs—what if he didn’t return? What if he completely leaves us here in the midst of a very expensive city where I do not know where to go or who to call to in times of crisis?
I noticed, like many others I have a problem with waiting (and perhaps with sanity).
Continue reading “7 Ways on how to Wait without Losing your Patience and Peace”
I’m the butterfly–
gorgeous creature in your palm
vast canvas of life
Now that you all know I am staying home, I have decided to embrace it for the moment until of course God change the course of my life. By embracing I mean totally and wholly giving myself to my role as a wife and a mother. This means totally leaving the past behind no matter how hurting and how I missed my work.
Just yesterday, my mother’s package arrived from Saudi. These are big box of groceries, a drum of clothes, shoes and bags and another box of curtains, pillow covers and bed sheets. It arrived at around 8:30 am just when we are about to go to school to get my kid’s report cards.
I am so very grateful with all these blessings. This comes right on time, just when we need them because my hubby has to start working again and we need supplies until he receive his first salary.
However, as I am unpacking all the clothes and bags, I can’t help but felt an ache inside me. Those clothes are meant for office, for a working mother. The shoes, the blazers, the very attractive bags suits a working woman I used to be. That made me teary eyed.
Continue reading “4 life’s essentials that a stay-at-home woman should focus on to gain her self-fulfillment (even when she’s nailed at home)”
candle bare flames
blackness arc of brilliant gold
stray embers they see
Boredom slowly taking its toll on me. It is creeping inside my body, squeezing my heart and made me pull my hair one by one. What I will be doing now that I have to stay at home? WHAT WILL I GONNA DO NOW?!!!
You know, I get used to working 12 hours a day before. I am a very workaholic person. Now I am here? The whole day today, I spent watching drama on TV. I am crying the whole afternoon until my eyes gets bulky. WAAAA!
Continue reading “why I write my goals even if I am now a certified stay-at-home who have an unknown future?”
lips smeared of chartreuse-
a rose be-speckled with dew
wondrin’ youth leaves me
Now that I am staying home for good, I am wondering what to do with my make-up, shoes and clothes I bought during office days? Can I still wear them at home? Can I still look my best even if all I have to do is wash the clothes, wash the dishes, and scrub my CR’s filthy floor?
Continue reading “5 reasons why a stay-at-home must look her best every day”
black hole in my head
a void, swallowing my hopes
I am out of the office officially now. Yesterday, I have decided not go back at all. I have just made sure I will get my salary this 3/25. I am really, really happy that what I got as I leave is the same amount my husband got when he lost his job. That’s enough for us to float for three months back then.
But you know what? I am so afraid like I have to see the horrifying Michael Myers in John Carpenter’s film Halloween (I’m not yet born when this film was created). Well, I don’t know where we go from here now that I lost my best source of income. The income that gives us food on the table, appliances, clothes, groceries and sense of pride. Now it’s gone.
After leaving the office, I ate Lumpiang Sariwa in Goldilocks, Market-market. From there, I am seeing SM Aura where my office is… Gosh! I wanna cry.
Continue reading “how to get back to being a stay-at-home mom after losing your job?”